"To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time for every purpose, under heaven"
This is a well known song by the Byrds (which I had to look up). Those lyrics were taken from well known scripture in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8. I'm familiar with the scripture and the song. Why, then, is it hard for me to accept the particular seasons of life I find myself in? Why is the grass always greener on the other side? Or at least, why does it seam that way? For example:
I cannot accurately measure myself against:
1. A beautiful 17-18 year old that has newly discovered freedoms and hardly any responsibilities, all while looking tight and fabulous in her swimsuit because she has not known the pain and pleasure of children.
2. The lucky couple that is completely settled in life and can go on walks together every evening or go grocery shopping by themselves without the added cost of a babysitter because their children are old enough to be by themselves.
3. The close-to or retired couple that finally have the income they needed when they were in my season, and now have the opportunities to travel more, and help others more, all while having the self esteem they wished they had when their bodies were "perfect." Also, enough life lessons learned that they appreciate life more fully now, than ever before.
4. The blessed old lady who has almost made the complete circle of life and is nothing but riveting stories from the "good ol days" and years worth of wisdom to her family, and knows that her time on this earth was not only spent well, but that it was loved well. And any day, she is ready and waiting for the Lord to take her home, where she can finally be rid of this beautiful disaster that is this world and return to those waiting for her on the other side.
I can't properly measure myself or my achievements against any of these others because they are in different seasons of life. Where did we get the idea that not only do we deserve to have "it" all but we deserve to have "it all right now?!" The same goes for women who think they need to have a degree or two, work full time, give service full time, own a business, travel, and raise young children, all at the same time!!! That's ludicrous. Of course, with any of these circumstances, there are always exceptions to the rule. But I'm not talking about them. The sad part is, that when any of us try to have or do everything at one time, something ALWAYS gets left behind, or there is always one thing that isn't done 100% like everything else and guess what that is? I'm reading this book right now that talks about living a more balanced life and they ask you to list in order of how much they mean to you, these 4 subjects. Family, Personal Character, Work/Career and Other Interests (including recreation, t.v, etc). Well of course, most of us make a list similar to the order I listed them. Then they ask you to list them in order according to how much time and thought you spend on each. Is it different? Mine was. guess where family came? It was third. I have no excuses. I simply felt that by being a stay-at-home mom, I was putting my family before everything else because it mattered most. What I found out, is that I often spend my time thinking, daydreaming about everything else!! If I can't start prioritizing a little better in life, none of my "seasons" are gonna feel well spent, never mind appreciated!
My season in life consists of this:
raising 3 beautiful little girls to become 3 responsible, joyful, sensitive women, who will become wives and mothers. And doing that means:
Being ok with helping them work out their disputes, picking up messes while teaching them how, having patience with them as they help me "clean" even though I could be much more efficient and affective. letting them make messes while they crack eggs and stir the brownie mix we make each Sunday. Reading with them or to them, even though, I would much rather be reading my own book all day long without interruptions. Changing diapers and giving baths so they know not only that I care about their hygiene, but I hope they do to. Teaching them they are, in fact, NOT entitled to everything that everyone else has, but that we should be grateful for the blessings we are given. (This is something I still work on myself.)
Doing all this means not getting enough sleep, but somehow being given enough strength and energy to carry out the physical demands of young children. Learning valuable financial lessons so that when our season comes around, we CAN travel more and help others more. Being grateful for the youth that I still have even though it feels like it is being sucked out of me every hour of the day. It also means enduring, maybe even singing along with, endless hours of Disney movies, Baby Einstein, and Elmo. Knowing that someday, I'll wish that was what they were still listening to. Enjoying how much they love to be with me and McKay. How easy it is for them to still hug and kiss us. And I am truly amazed at how easily they forgive. Thank goodness! I am growing with them and am a student of parenting, always looking for better ways, therefor, I stumble frequently and need all the forgiving they can muster. This is my season in life. For better or worse, it is what it is, and it will never come around again!!!
